So THAT'S what it feels like...

Let me just say it's been a long time since I've let loose and laughed very much.  And let me just say it's been even longer since I've physically injured myself laughing so hard.

My best friend came for a visit this weekend and we had so much fun.  We ate dinner and took off on Friday, leaving the kiddos with the hubbies to put to bed.  Her kids were sick, so she left them with her in-laws.  So it made it nice that we only had to worry about one set of kids.  We went shopping at our new outdoor mall and had a scrumptious brownie sundae and made ourselves sick.  We caught up on everything from our parents, our kids to our bodily functions...well, maybe I should say HER bodily functions.  Disclaimer:  I have NOT missed that side of her.  ;oD

Maybe I should preface this little story with the fact that she is even grosser than me.  I didn't think that was possible.  One would argue that somewhere along the way our parents went horribly wrong at some point.  We both feel like a marriage isn't a marriage until you can fart in front of your husband.  She's the ONLY friend I have that I'm comfortable enough to be myself, farts included.  I love that and found myself slipping back into who I am, getting back in touch with a side of me I thought was long gone since marriage and kids.  I guess farting can do that to someone.

So anyway, we're stuck in traffic.  In an enclosed van.  On a hot night.  Thank goodness for air conditioning is all I can say.  Before I know it, she's sitting there in a little green fog and making my pregnant self nauseous.  We started laughing so hard I couldn't breathe.  She almost spewed diet coke all over my van.  I pulled a muscle in my temple because I was straining so hard for air (for which I'm still paying for with a 3 day headache, but it was worth it).  Don't ask me why we found this so funny.  Perhaps it was because we hadn't seen each other for any length of time in years (we were both pregnant with our now 2 year olds).  Perhaps it was because she can peel off not just paint but the freakin' dry wall straight down to the studs of a house with her nasty self.  Or maybe it was because we still connect after marriage and motherhood and living 2 hours away from each other for over 10 years now, which from what I hear is hard to do and what I've experienced with some of my other friends.

I laugh all the time, don't get me wrong.  Hubby enjoys the "true" benefits of marriage with me.  But I haven't laughed like that in a long time.  I haven't been myself in a long time.  I'm a people pleaser and surrounded by people who expect a lot from me emotionally, physically and spiritually.  My friend new me before I moved away from home, loves me for who I am and doesn't care if I fart.  She doesn't care if I'm not perfect.  She doesn't care if I'm a schedule freak with my kids or obsess that a noise might wake them up at night, probably because she's the same way.  She wouldn't care if I didn't feel like doing something, all the more time for us to sit on the couch and do nothing together.

I needed time like that this weekend.  I needed to be reminded that I don't have to be perfect, I don't have to say something in just the right way.  I can be angry about something and vent and not feel guilty.  I can be me.

And I can laugh again.

Wow.  I had almost forgotten.

I hope I did you proud, Fart Pants.  I miss you.